I'm lacking motivation today. To do everything. To clean. To blog. To go shopping. To even go take a nap. Sad huh. I have about 5 hours until I have to get my youngest from school and then go to my oldest football game. So much could be done...but I don't know where to start. I could go do some dishes...or laundry...or paint some dresser drawers...or go grocery shopping...or go play with a whole bunch of Styrofoam that I just brought home from work. So many choices...too many.
I keep reminding myself that today is my only TRUE day off this week. I got off at 7am yesterday...and I go back in at 11pm tomorrow. I'm working for a coworker on Wednesday and Thursday night...as a last minute favor. I do plan on getting the dresser drawers done before October. I do know I started them in June...but hey...a woman gets distracted...and this woman is very easily distracted!
On the plus side I should be receiving my NEWEST Ebay order sometime today or tomorrow. Super excited. One is just for me...and the other is a decoration for my room. Also I ordered some small gifts for Reilly (my middle son) for his birthday in November. I bought him new skateboard (Longboard) wheels a few months ago and told him they were his bday present (because they were $40). But I found some Lego mini figures on Ebay and scooped them up for about $1 a piece (13 of them...two separate orders). He is a Lego freak. I know he is going to love them!
Also I have to change my Christmas theme. My mom told me that I can NOT have "The Nightmare Before Christmas" as a theme. She said we are doing Christmas here this year, because our house is bigger. And she did not want to see any ghosts or goblins or 18 eyed spiders with Santa hats on. So now I have to decide on a new theme :(
I know, I know, I'm an adult. But she has a key and I know I would come home one day to find my house empty of all Halloween décor. So I was thinking of doing a "candy" theme. Every year it is different. Last year was the "Old Fashioned" theme...and the year before was the royal colors...and before that was blue and silver. SO...a candy theme will be fun :D
However, because I have a million other things to do before I can think about Christmas...I can't plan to much yet.
But until then...I'm going to start on some laundry...and some dishes...and then allow myself to take a nice hot shower. Maybe a small quick nap...and a nice candy filled dream...about gum drops and lollipops...clean kitchen and folded clothes...
Tuesday, September 23, 2014
Thursday, September 18, 2014
Side of the Road Treasure- Day 16
I am always surprised at the stuff people throw away. Granted 80% of it is probably garbage, but sometimes it is perfect for someone else. Now obviously this isn't a surprise. This is why there are Freecycle, Craigslist, Ebay, and even donating it to charity. But still some people just throw it on the side of the road so it can end up in a landfill. But not today! Today I had to race and pass the garbage truck just to get to one house.
This week Green Bay residents can put big items out on the curb to be picked up. I haven't picked anything off the side of the road in a long time...mostly because I didn't have any extra space to store it...and I don't have a van anymore. But today...I couldn't pass up today!
I was dropping the boys off at their bus stop and I saw an odd looking shelf. I loved the colors and shape of it and decided to stop on my way back home. Then I noticed the garbage guys coming down the road. I had to quickly turn around and pass them just to get back to the "sweet spot". Once there I had to jam the shelf thingy into my trunk (I think it stuck out about 3 feet and was barely in the trunk at all...thankfully I was only a mile from home). Then I noticed a tall kids easel with a chalkboard on one side and a dry erase board on the other. The only thing wrong with it, was it was missing a small wooden dowel on the bottom (less than $1 at Menards). I quickly wiggled that into my back seat and smacked my head on the car door frame when the garbage guys honked at me.
I just gave a weird smile and said, "but I'm not done". They just laughed at said I had 5 seconds. I didn't know if they were kidding or not...but I grabbed a small bench seat and threw it in the front seat before I drove off.
The shelf thing is a little over 5' tall and completely connected and very sturdy. The tags on it says Alice White on it. I did some research and couldn't find a brand name with that name, because it is painted on and professionally done. Either way I plan on repainting it and using it for storage...not sure where yet.
The easel I'm going to fix up and probably give it to my xh and his wife for their kids. Maybe save it for a Christmas/birthday present. Same with the little seat. It has zoo animals on it with NO damage. SUPER cute! Either way I was super excited to find all of these treasures...and all at ONE house!
This week Green Bay residents can put big items out on the curb to be picked up. I haven't picked anything off the side of the road in a long time...mostly because I didn't have any extra space to store it...and I don't have a van anymore. But today...I couldn't pass up today!
I was dropping the boys off at their bus stop and I saw an odd looking shelf. I loved the colors and shape of it and decided to stop on my way back home. Then I noticed the garbage guys coming down the road. I had to quickly turn around and pass them just to get back to the "sweet spot". Once there I had to jam the shelf thingy into my trunk (I think it stuck out about 3 feet and was barely in the trunk at all...thankfully I was only a mile from home). Then I noticed a tall kids easel with a chalkboard on one side and a dry erase board on the other. The only thing wrong with it, was it was missing a small wooden dowel on the bottom (less than $1 at Menards). I quickly wiggled that into my back seat and smacked my head on the car door frame when the garbage guys honked at me.
I just gave a weird smile and said, "but I'm not done". They just laughed at said I had 5 seconds. I didn't know if they were kidding or not...but I grabbed a small bench seat and threw it in the front seat before I drove off.
The shelf thing is a little over 5' tall and completely connected and very sturdy. The tags on it says Alice White on it. I did some research and couldn't find a brand name with that name, because it is painted on and professionally done. Either way I plan on repainting it and using it for storage...not sure where yet.
The easel I'm going to fix up and probably give it to my xh and his wife for their kids. Maybe save it for a Christmas/birthday present. Same with the little seat. It has zoo animals on it with NO damage. SUPER cute! Either way I was super excited to find all of these treasures...and all at ONE house!
Then at work, I was on a VERY slow machine (142 for those that know it) for 12 hours. I had plenty of time to work on my Halloween party list. I have the list together for all of the food and some ideas for decorations.
I also have to change the date. Looking to do it on Saturday, November 1st now instead. I didn't realize the boys had a church thing all day on Sunday. That sucks because I had some people that I knew couldn't make it on Saturday :'(
It's okay. I will take lots of pictures :D
Tomorrow (Thursday) I have overtime again..from 3pm-11pm. So this week I will have 24 hours of overtime. Next week I think I only have 8 hours of overtime....only...lol. I just have to remember to bring some cardboard home. That's one reason I love my job...so many craft ideas! Did I mention how much I love craft time :D :D :D
Tuesday, September 16, 2014
Yummick! Halloween party food ideas-Day 15
Ok so today will be a cooking/craft post. Even though I had a good day. Worked some overtime. Watched my oldest son's first 8th grade football game...they lost...but from what Easton said...the other team played pretty dirty. Best part of the day....chatting with a friend. Felt nice to chat again. It has put a smile on my face.
But for tonight I decided to try to make the "Bloody Severed Fingers" aka hotdogs. Here is the picture I like:
But for tonight I decided to try to make the "Bloody Severed Fingers" aka hotdogs. Here is the picture I like:
And how it turned out:
I think I might just make a bunch of small ones like in the picture. And this one I didn't do yet...but because it looks so simple I will wait and do it for the party....yummick! This is the new word I just made up for the food I'm going to serve. Yummick (yummy and icky).
Monday, September 15, 2014
My Colorful Grass-Day 14
On the way home from work this morning I ran into an old coworker that I haven't seen in years. I was in the grocery store just getting off the phone when she approached me. I was surprised when the first thing she said to me was, "Hey Veronica, long time no see. I didn't mean to ease drop on your phone call, but it sounds like you are doing really good. I'm super envious. What's your secret? Can we switch lives...hahahaha...no seriously we can switch anytime." I didn't say anything right away, being completely caught off guard. I did mumble something like, "wait...what?"
She explained how she had overheard how much I love my job now (I was talking about how I like my position so much better than before), planning a Halloween party (at a place that is big enough and that I am proud of), and about a new "love" interest (I was talking about a previous guy that I'm having a huge issue trying to not think about every 6 seconds). Then she mentioned that she didn't recognize me at first and congratulated me on losing so much weight (down almost 50 lbs since I last saw her), and how great I look.
You're envious? Of what? I don't see it. Yeah I have lost weight...you do that when all you do for a year is work and sleep. I would love to drop another 50lbs...and lots of firming up to do. Looking good? Are you kidding me? Do you need new glasses? I just got done working a 12 hour shift in a hair net. My hair is standing on end...hasn't been brushed in 3 days...and super frizzy. I have deep bags under my eyes from the mixture of stress and not sleeping well this weekend.
I work crazy hours and every weekend. I'm always picking up extra hours when my kids aren't around, so I don't spend time with friends. I am one of the few people that will work all three shifts, and for the most part go to work when I am called in. And yes, I like my position now....but a had to deal with a 15 months of dreading going into work before I got this position. And the two degrees that I have....have nothing to do with where I work. All that time...and stress...for what? A fork lift job in a factory that anyone out of high school can get?
The "love" interest...yeah I was smiling when I was talking about that because I was thinking back to how great things were...and how much I fucked it up. I was just standing in the aisle mentally going through everything I have ever done wrong with every guy I have been with. But then I find this great guy...sparks fly...the goosebumps were back...and I got scared. Things were going so great that I was waiting for that other shoe to drop. Big mistake. My fault. I get that. But for a kinda-stranger to think everything is still great...I must be a damn good actress!
And my house. Hell yeah I am proud of my house. I'm excited to be able to have more that TWO NON family members ever come to my house. As much as I have always hated hardwood floors, it is helping me keep things clean. I love having all the space that I have, so yes I do want to show it off.
But I don't tell her all of that. I don't tell her about the hell I have been through in the last 3 years. Going through my SECOND divorce. Getting a hysterectomy at 30 because of pre-cervical cancer cells and PCOS. Losing a great job...and being unemployed for 9 months. Getting evicted from my home of 4 years to move across town (to a place 1/2 the size and more money) and having to rent from a slumlord because no one else would rent to me. Having to take a job working at a factory for almost 1/2 as much as I was making at my old job. Pulling my kids out of school half way through the year to transfer to a different district. Then having my only vehicle completely die on my 3rd day of work.
Switch lives? With me? Seriously? Sure...when do you want to start? Are you still working a M-F 9-5 job making over 35K a year (maybe with a 50hr work week for the rest of the year...I MIGHT hit 30K...maybe)? Are you still with the same guy that has held a steady job for 15 years and still leaves you little love notes in your lunch that he packs? Do you have kids yet?
Sure...here are my keys and debt card. Careful I just got paid on Friday, but you are out of groceries and there are still bills due. You have 3 kids to pick up from 2 different locations after school. You are now scheduled to work for the next 13 days straight on all 3 shifts. And between work your oldest has a football game out of town tomorrow, and laundry has to be done. Plus you need to make an appointment to see your OBGYN specialist because your pap just came back abnormal with pre-cancer cells again and because you don't have insurance you can't afford to see her to find out what the hell is wrong. So have fun reading WAY TO MUCH online about what could be wrong until January.
Sure, the grass may be greener on the other side...but do you know what they have used for fertilizer? Do you know what the soil content is underneath? Are you sure it is real grass and not AstroTurf? Maybe they spray paint it green while you sleep? Do you really want to know?
Nope, I don't tell her all of that. I just smile and tell her that it has been a rough 3 years, but with hard work and dedication, my life is on track.
But seriously. Until she said something, I had no idea how good I have it. I have a pretty flexible job that pays the bills. I am working all of this overtime because I CHOOSE too. I don't want to be home alone so I work any shifts I can. I choose not to take the insurance because we get to see the clinic dr for free (I will take it in January). I do have three amazing boys that are happy and healthy and very active in school and sports.
So to answer your question. No. I'm sorry I can't switch lives with you. Because I don't know how you fertilize your yard...but I can trust what method I use. And the color that is showing....I can live with that. The bare patches and dead grass clumps...those are fine too. I know how to work on them. The weeds...hell...they ADD to my grass. To show that it isn't perfect. But it is a fighter and will continue to show up no matter what. And that is okay. I can accept that. I will embrace it and make it my own. So admire all your want. I have earned all the colors of my grass!
She explained how she had overheard how much I love my job now (I was talking about how I like my position so much better than before), planning a Halloween party (at a place that is big enough and that I am proud of), and about a new "love" interest (I was talking about a previous guy that I'm having a huge issue trying to not think about every 6 seconds). Then she mentioned that she didn't recognize me at first and congratulated me on losing so much weight (down almost 50 lbs since I last saw her), and how great I look.
You're envious? Of what? I don't see it. Yeah I have lost weight...you do that when all you do for a year is work and sleep. I would love to drop another 50lbs...and lots of firming up to do. Looking good? Are you kidding me? Do you need new glasses? I just got done working a 12 hour shift in a hair net. My hair is standing on end...hasn't been brushed in 3 days...and super frizzy. I have deep bags under my eyes from the mixture of stress and not sleeping well this weekend.
I work crazy hours and every weekend. I'm always picking up extra hours when my kids aren't around, so I don't spend time with friends. I am one of the few people that will work all three shifts, and for the most part go to work when I am called in. And yes, I like my position now....but a had to deal with a 15 months of dreading going into work before I got this position. And the two degrees that I have....have nothing to do with where I work. All that time...and stress...for what? A fork lift job in a factory that anyone out of high school can get?
The "love" interest...yeah I was smiling when I was talking about that because I was thinking back to how great things were...and how much I fucked it up. I was just standing in the aisle mentally going through everything I have ever done wrong with every guy I have been with. But then I find this great guy...sparks fly...the goosebumps were back...and I got scared. Things were going so great that I was waiting for that other shoe to drop. Big mistake. My fault. I get that. But for a kinda-stranger to think everything is still great...I must be a damn good actress!
And my house. Hell yeah I am proud of my house. I'm excited to be able to have more that TWO NON family members ever come to my house. As much as I have always hated hardwood floors, it is helping me keep things clean. I love having all the space that I have, so yes I do want to show it off.
But I don't tell her all of that. I don't tell her about the hell I have been through in the last 3 years. Going through my SECOND divorce. Getting a hysterectomy at 30 because of pre-cervical cancer cells and PCOS. Losing a great job...and being unemployed for 9 months. Getting evicted from my home of 4 years to move across town (to a place 1/2 the size and more money) and having to rent from a slumlord because no one else would rent to me. Having to take a job working at a factory for almost 1/2 as much as I was making at my old job. Pulling my kids out of school half way through the year to transfer to a different district. Then having my only vehicle completely die on my 3rd day of work.
Switch lives? With me? Seriously? Sure...when do you want to start? Are you still working a M-F 9-5 job making over 35K a year (maybe with a 50hr work week for the rest of the year...I MIGHT hit 30K...maybe)? Are you still with the same guy that has held a steady job for 15 years and still leaves you little love notes in your lunch that he packs? Do you have kids yet?
Sure...here are my keys and debt card. Careful I just got paid on Friday, but you are out of groceries and there are still bills due. You have 3 kids to pick up from 2 different locations after school. You are now scheduled to work for the next 13 days straight on all 3 shifts. And between work your oldest has a football game out of town tomorrow, and laundry has to be done. Plus you need to make an appointment to see your OBGYN specialist because your pap just came back abnormal with pre-cancer cells again and because you don't have insurance you can't afford to see her to find out what the hell is wrong. So have fun reading WAY TO MUCH online about what could be wrong until January.
Sure, the grass may be greener on the other side...but do you know what they have used for fertilizer? Do you know what the soil content is underneath? Are you sure it is real grass and not AstroTurf? Maybe they spray paint it green while you sleep? Do you really want to know?
Nope, I don't tell her all of that. I just smile and tell her that it has been a rough 3 years, but with hard work and dedication, my life is on track.
But seriously. Until she said something, I had no idea how good I have it. I have a pretty flexible job that pays the bills. I am working all of this overtime because I CHOOSE too. I don't want to be home alone so I work any shifts I can. I choose not to take the insurance because we get to see the clinic dr for free (I will take it in January). I do have three amazing boys that are happy and healthy and very active in school and sports.
So to answer your question. No. I'm sorry I can't switch lives with you. Because I don't know how you fertilize your yard...but I can trust what method I use. And the color that is showing....I can live with that. The bare patches and dead grass clumps...those are fine too. I know how to work on them. The weeds...hell...they ADD to my grass. To show that it isn't perfect. But it is a fighter and will continue to show up no matter what. And that is okay. I can accept that. I will embrace it and make it my own. So admire all your want. I have earned all the colors of my grass!
Friday, September 12, 2014
Halloween AND Christmas YES!!! Day 11
So far, for the 4 hours I have been awake, today has sucked. My oldest two boys and I, had an appointment out in Oneida (25 minutes across town) for noon. So I picked them up early from school, drove over and found out that they had to cancel our appointment and we would have to reschedule. Super pissed. Drove all the way back across town just for my middle son to tell me we had to pick up his phone from the bus garage...that we just passed 4 exits ago...grrrrr.
But if that is all that has happened...not too bad. I made my appointment to go see the dr about my leg. It is pretty warm and you can feel it making a "creaking" movement. So now I just have to wait until Wednesday. The nurse told me to try to stay off of my feet and apply heat to it. I just laughed and said I didn't think my forklift had a plug in for my heating pad. So I guess I will try to take it easier at work this weekend...only three machines running...no problem.
Also, I am slowing getting back into couponing. I'm not going to go crazy like I did last time. In fact we still have a few boxes of Hamburger Helper that I bought over 2 years ago. Couldn't pass it up when I was able to get it for $.25 a box :D So Stefani and I are going shopping tomorrow...stock up the pantry a little. Next stop is to buy a chest freezer. Slowly but surely is the way to go....
Also I have been "pinning" Halloween ideas like crazy on Pinterest. Not sure what I am going to dress up as. Not sure if I want guts and gore...or sweet and sexy. Considering kids will be here too...I want it to be decent. My FAVORITE holiday...still super excited! I have some plain black picture frames that I bought at Goodwill in Stevens Point that I would like to make some 3D art to stand out. Pretty tempted to make our Christmas theme this year as the Nightmare Before Christmas!!! That way I can keep my Halloween stuff up all the way past new years, as long as I add some Santa hats to the goblins.
***doing a happy dance***
Ok so today hasn't sucked. Hopefully this weekend goes by fast. That way I can start decorating and planning!!!!! Yeah Christmas and Halloween!
But if that is all that has happened...not too bad. I made my appointment to go see the dr about my leg. It is pretty warm and you can feel it making a "creaking" movement. So now I just have to wait until Wednesday. The nurse told me to try to stay off of my feet and apply heat to it. I just laughed and said I didn't think my forklift had a plug in for my heating pad. So I guess I will try to take it easier at work this weekend...only three machines running...no problem.
Also, I am slowing getting back into couponing. I'm not going to go crazy like I did last time. In fact we still have a few boxes of Hamburger Helper that I bought over 2 years ago. Couldn't pass it up when I was able to get it for $.25 a box :D So Stefani and I are going shopping tomorrow...stock up the pantry a little. Next stop is to buy a chest freezer. Slowly but surely is the way to go....
Also I have been "pinning" Halloween ideas like crazy on Pinterest. Not sure what I am going to dress up as. Not sure if I want guts and gore...or sweet and sexy. Considering kids will be here too...I want it to be decent. My FAVORITE holiday...still super excited! I have some plain black picture frames that I bought at Goodwill in Stevens Point that I would like to make some 3D art to stand out. Pretty tempted to make our Christmas theme this year as the Nightmare Before Christmas!!! That way I can keep my Halloween stuff up all the way past new years, as long as I add some Santa hats to the goblins.
***doing a happy dance***
Ok so today hasn't sucked. Hopefully this weekend goes by fast. That way I can start decorating and planning!!!!! Yeah Christmas and Halloween!
9/11 and Planning my Halloween Party! Day 10
First off...today is the 13th anniversary of 9/11. Patriots Day. As a strong supporter of the Military...with many friends and family active and veterans...I salute you. I was working at the Radisson Hotel and Casino across from Green Bays Airport when the terror struck. With the airport closed down suddenly and us being so close, we were quickly over filled with travelers. We had people sleeping in the chairs in the hallway, and we kept the restaurant open for 24 hours. It was a crazy and hectic day for everyone. Yet we all can probably remember where we were, what we saw, and how we felt. And 13 years later...here we are. Alive and thriving! Trying to live life to the fullest, but never forgetting those 2, 996 lives that were lost. May the 2,977 rest in peace, while the 19 hijackers rot in whatever hell they believe in!
Now...a positive note...
Today was a perfect day. After my last post I watched two full episodes of Revenge while refilling my incredible comforting hot bath...went to bed and slept for 8 hours...STRAIGHT! That was the first time I have slept that long in a long time. It was amazing. The weather was a balmy 58* in my house, and with 6 blankets on the bed it was great. It definitely helped keep me sleeping. Bring on the snow!!!
I have also been talking to Janelle and now I definitely want to have a Halloween party. I finally have a place that has the room to host it. I will love to decorate the basement up for the kids party and the upstairs for the adults. Depending on the weather...maybe something in the backyard too!
However with me working weekends (as of now), and Halloween falling on a Friday this year, I have decided to have the party the Sunday after (November 2). I figure it is easier for me to get a Sunday night off, Halloween decorations will be on clearance, AND the Packers have a BYE that Sunday! SCORE one for me!!!
With the lack of Facebook, I have "reconnected" with Pinterest. I'm super excited to have this idea and I can't wait to get started! So keep the date open! And feel free to send any ideas my way. Don't be surprised if the rest of the blog will be craft updates :D :D :D
Now...a positive note...
Today was a perfect day. After my last post I watched two full episodes of Revenge while refilling my incredible comforting hot bath...went to bed and slept for 8 hours...STRAIGHT! That was the first time I have slept that long in a long time. It was amazing. The weather was a balmy 58* in my house, and with 6 blankets on the bed it was great. It definitely helped keep me sleeping. Bring on the snow!!!
I have also been talking to Janelle and now I definitely want to have a Halloween party. I finally have a place that has the room to host it. I will love to decorate the basement up for the kids party and the upstairs for the adults. Depending on the weather...maybe something in the backyard too!
However with me working weekends (as of now), and Halloween falling on a Friday this year, I have decided to have the party the Sunday after (November 2). I figure it is easier for me to get a Sunday night off, Halloween decorations will be on clearance, AND the Packers have a BYE that Sunday! SCORE one for me!!!
With the lack of Facebook, I have "reconnected" with Pinterest. I'm super excited to have this idea and I can't wait to get started! So keep the date open! And feel free to send any ideas my way. Don't be surprised if the rest of the blog will be craft updates :D :D :D
Thursday, September 11, 2014
I am not a Control Freak, just as long as I am in charge. Day 9.
Ok I know I live in Wisconsin, and Wisconsin has always been known as a cold state....HOWEVER...today is September 9th (or 10th because it is after midnight). It is SUPPOSE TO BE WARM! Last year it was 90* for the high and 68* for the low (Yes I had to google it to check it). Today it was a high of 72* and a low of....drum roll...46* Crazy! As much as I LOVE cold weather...I was very surprised to come home (at 3am) to a house with all the windows open and the temp reading 55* inside....brrrr! But I will sleep great today...under 6 cozy blankets!
Today was a long day. My oldest son was up all night Tuesday night sick (it has been making the rounds at his dads house in the past week). He made it a point to wake me up each time he threw up....wonderful. I always feel so bad when there isn't anything I can do to take the pain away. Thankfully both of us got some much needed sleep during the day.
Since Friday night I have been having really bad shin splints on my right leg. It hasn't been bad at home, but within an hour of being at work it kills. Everything I have been told/read said to ice and rest. HA. Yeah like that is going to happen. Depending on how I feel tomorrow (Thursday) I might make an appointment to have it looked at on Friday. I know I didn't fall or smack it on anything...but still it is nice to know what is going on.
I ended up having to go into work from 3pm-11pm to cover a coworker (I knew about it last week). And because I am such a GREAT person...I stayed until 3am to help some more. I didn't feel all that great about it. By 1am I was getting pretty crabby. I started to remember why I hated packing bottles. I am not in control.
I wouldn't call myself a control freak...but I do freak when I am not in control..lol. Packing bottles means I am stuck at a machine. I can't get a drink when I want. I can't go to the bathroom when I want. I'm dependent on other people to come over at their time to give me breaks. I'm never sure when my breaks will start, and I hate that part.
Working material or warehouse I'm more in control. I'm not tied down to a machine waiting for others. I can choose when to take a break. Where I can go. What I can do. And at the pace I like. It allows me to stay busy and not bored. I like that.
However what I would like right now is a hot shower and some Ibuprofen. I'm not sure if I will be called in to work tonight. Depends if I decide to answer my phone or not...because I am in control...most times :D
Today was a long day. My oldest son was up all night Tuesday night sick (it has been making the rounds at his dads house in the past week). He made it a point to wake me up each time he threw up....wonderful. I always feel so bad when there isn't anything I can do to take the pain away. Thankfully both of us got some much needed sleep during the day.
Since Friday night I have been having really bad shin splints on my right leg. It hasn't been bad at home, but within an hour of being at work it kills. Everything I have been told/read said to ice and rest. HA. Yeah like that is going to happen. Depending on how I feel tomorrow (Thursday) I might make an appointment to have it looked at on Friday. I know I didn't fall or smack it on anything...but still it is nice to know what is going on.
I ended up having to go into work from 3pm-11pm to cover a coworker (I knew about it last week). And because I am such a GREAT person...I stayed until 3am to help some more. I didn't feel all that great about it. By 1am I was getting pretty crabby. I started to remember why I hated packing bottles. I am not in control.
I wouldn't call myself a control freak...but I do freak when I am not in control..lol. Packing bottles means I am stuck at a machine. I can't get a drink when I want. I can't go to the bathroom when I want. I'm dependent on other people to come over at their time to give me breaks. I'm never sure when my breaks will start, and I hate that part.
Working material or warehouse I'm more in control. I'm not tied down to a machine waiting for others. I can choose when to take a break. Where I can go. What I can do. And at the pace I like. It allows me to stay busy and not bored. I like that.
However what I would like right now is a hot shower and some Ibuprofen. I'm not sure if I will be called in to work tonight. Depends if I decide to answer my phone or not...because I am in control...most times :D
Tuesday, September 9, 2014
Life starts after the next episode. Day 8
I haven't updated in awhile...mostly because when I work weekends, that is all I do. Work and sleep...work and sleep...work and sleep. Fun fun. After a very slow weekend at work I had a lot of
time to plan things. For home...work...and personal life.
I had time to reflect on my visit to my best friend Janelle's house over Labor Day weekend. She introduced me to the show Revenge. LOVE IT! Currently I'm only half way through Season 2, and Season 4 starts in 2 weeks. And we had plenty of Girl Talk. Loved that even more!
I was reading through a book of hers and the one thing that caught my attention was the phrase "Dirty dishes lead to Debt". This made perfect sense. There has been too many times in my life that I've gone out to eat because I didn't have the energy to do dishes to cook dinner. This will have to change.
Lately I have been pretty good at getting things picked up. I have the time to do so...and I have a place that I really love. For the first time in a long time this new place feels like "home". I want to make it look nice. I want to be able to welcome people in...without having them give me a week notice. But most of all, I want my kids to be able to come home to a clean and organized home. A home they are proud of as much as I am.
My goals are simple. Clean. Organize. Repeat. Ok, they sound simple...everything sounds simple when written down. It is the "doing" part that is hard. Trying to stay focused and on task will be a bitch to do. For me at least.
One step at a time...one load of laundry at a time...one sink full of dishes at a time...just as soon as this episode of Revenge is over...or maybe the next episode too ;)
time to plan things. For home...work...and personal life.
I had time to reflect on my visit to my best friend Janelle's house over Labor Day weekend. She introduced me to the show Revenge. LOVE IT! Currently I'm only half way through Season 2, and Season 4 starts in 2 weeks. And we had plenty of Girl Talk. Loved that even more!
I was reading through a book of hers and the one thing that caught my attention was the phrase "Dirty dishes lead to Debt". This made perfect sense. There has been too many times in my life that I've gone out to eat because I didn't have the energy to do dishes to cook dinner. This will have to change.
Lately I have been pretty good at getting things picked up. I have the time to do so...and I have a place that I really love. For the first time in a long time this new place feels like "home". I want to make it look nice. I want to be able to welcome people in...without having them give me a week notice. But most of all, I want my kids to be able to come home to a clean and organized home. A home they are proud of as much as I am.
My goals are simple. Clean. Organize. Repeat. Ok, they sound simple...everything sounds simple when written down. It is the "doing" part that is hard. Trying to stay focused and on task will be a bitch to do. For me at least.
One step at a time...one load of laundry at a time...one sink full of dishes at a time...just as soon as this episode of Revenge is over...or maybe the next episode too ;)
Friday, September 5, 2014
Take every small step you can get. Day 5
Today was a good day. In fact it was a great day! I received a phone call at 11pm asking....actually begging me to come into work. I had nothing else planned except a nice hot bath and more episodes of Revenge (Thank you Janelle for getting me hooked). So I got dressed drove in and worked a long 8 hours. But that was last night...not the great part. The great part began at 7:02am and still continues...
A friend from work and I went to McD's for breakfast that lasted over two hours. It was what I think both of us needed. Lots and lots of laughs and even more funny looks from the old people seated around us. It was a blast and I'm very glad we had to chance to catch up.
Then after I was able to finally get some sleep, I received an odd text message. I was asked to switch positions with someone. He wanted my weekend night position and in turn....I would get his first shift position. I woke up very fast and long story short...we will talk to management next week and hopefully starting October I will be on first shift.
As much as I love working weekends on 3rd shift I don't get to see my kids very much. It was perfect for summer time, but now with the kids in school, first shift would be perfect. But, I have been burned in the past with new positions, so I am not getting my hopes up...too much.
But that isn't even the best part. The best part of today was getting yet another phone call saying that if I wanted to come into work at my normal 7pm time I could...or...here's the best part...I could sleep in and not come in until 11pm. YEAH!
It truly is the small things in life that make everything good....or bad. But I will take today. A step in the right direction. A step up and closer to happiness. And even if later on I slip up and fall back a few steps...I had today. Today was a good day. I will take it.
A friend from work and I went to McD's for breakfast that lasted over two hours. It was what I think both of us needed. Lots and lots of laughs and even more funny looks from the old people seated around us. It was a blast and I'm very glad we had to chance to catch up.
Then after I was able to finally get some sleep, I received an odd text message. I was asked to switch positions with someone. He wanted my weekend night position and in turn....I would get his first shift position. I woke up very fast and long story short...we will talk to management next week and hopefully starting October I will be on first shift.
As much as I love working weekends on 3rd shift I don't get to see my kids very much. It was perfect for summer time, but now with the kids in school, first shift would be perfect. But, I have been burned in the past with new positions, so I am not getting my hopes up...too much.
But that isn't even the best part. The best part of today was getting yet another phone call saying that if I wanted to come into work at my normal 7pm time I could...or...here's the best part...I could sleep in and not come in until 11pm. YEAH!
It truly is the small things in life that make everything good....or bad. But I will take today. A step in the right direction. A step up and closer to happiness. And even if later on I slip up and fall back a few steps...I had today. Today was a good day. I will take it.
Thursday, September 4, 2014
Losing Myself in the Down Pour- Day 4
They say a nice rain cleanses the soul. So what about the downpour that we have had on and off all day today? I wonder who's soul needs that much cleansing? It felt good though. The rain came down around 2:15 this morning...I was still awake...like I am most nights. So I decided to go sit outside in the back yard. After a few moments I laid down in the wet grass and just closed my eyes. For the first time in a long time I didn't think...I didn't worry...I didn't remember the pain. The rain seemed to wash away everything I needed it too.
This afternoon I tried to nap, but I was tossing and turning. I walked outside and within minutes it started down pouring again. Soaked to the bone I laid down once again and just relaxed. Not hearing the cars driving by...not hearing the neighbors yelling as they were caught in the rain...and even not hearing the rain splash down around me. I felt good. I was relaxed and calm. I went inside, dried off, and slept comfortably.
Later this afternoon I went to my oldest sons football game. Our middle son stayed after school to watch the game, but we couldn't find him. After an hour of hoping he would show up we all went looking for him. His dad went one way. His stepmom stayed near the game. And I drove to the school, where I found him. I didn't know if I should be pissed or happy...but I was both. He explained what had happened and why he didn't come back to the game....but my heart was still beating through my chest.
We got back to the field to find out it was canceled because of lightening. The boys left with their dad and stepmom and I drove home. The downpour started within seconds of dropping my son off and didn't look like it would let up. When I got home, I walked around into the back yard, laid back down in the grass and took a deep breath.
This time was different. This time I was thinking...I felt all the worry...all the pain. I heard all of the neighbors...and the cars...and the rain drops roaring in my ears. This time the rain seemed to bring it all back. Memories that were once locked up behind a wall. Good with the bad. Twisting and intertwining together...in a puzzle no one could have ever solved.
But the rain...somehow seemed to clear the pieces up. Made it so that the good and the bad memories can separate just a little. Following along like a tiny stream picking up other tiny streams before joining the river. And this river will steadily flow. Flow right against the dam that has been built to protect those puzzle pieces.
The problem with this dam is that it is an old dam. A dam that looked more like a patch worked quilt made by a child. And this dam is getting tired. Tired of holding back the constant river. Tired of being rammed over and over again. Assaulted by the individual drops that have ganged up and raged war against this dam. It isn't the dam's fault. It is just doing its job. The fault lies behind the dam...with the Builder.
Maybe this Builder needs to realize that there is no hope keeping this dam from breaking. Maybe the Builder needs to let go of the blueprints and stop filling all the cracks. Maybe start picking away at the patches and take control of the breakdown. Maybe the first piece will be a letter.
A letter that has been written and rewritten a million times. Torn up...tossed away...flushed...and burned...but never forgotten. A letter of truths and pains from the past. A letter of choices and consequences. A letter of forgiveness. The final destination for this letter.....Montana.
The down pour is once again over...but never far away.
This afternoon I tried to nap, but I was tossing and turning. I walked outside and within minutes it started down pouring again. Soaked to the bone I laid down once again and just relaxed. Not hearing the cars driving by...not hearing the neighbors yelling as they were caught in the rain...and even not hearing the rain splash down around me. I felt good. I was relaxed and calm. I went inside, dried off, and slept comfortably.
Later this afternoon I went to my oldest sons football game. Our middle son stayed after school to watch the game, but we couldn't find him. After an hour of hoping he would show up we all went looking for him. His dad went one way. His stepmom stayed near the game. And I drove to the school, where I found him. I didn't know if I should be pissed or happy...but I was both. He explained what had happened and why he didn't come back to the game....but my heart was still beating through my chest.
We got back to the field to find out it was canceled because of lightening. The boys left with their dad and stepmom and I drove home. The downpour started within seconds of dropping my son off and didn't look like it would let up. When I got home, I walked around into the back yard, laid back down in the grass and took a deep breath.
This time was different. This time I was thinking...I felt all the worry...all the pain. I heard all of the neighbors...and the cars...and the rain drops roaring in my ears. This time the rain seemed to bring it all back. Memories that were once locked up behind a wall. Good with the bad. Twisting and intertwining together...in a puzzle no one could have ever solved.
But the rain...somehow seemed to clear the pieces up. Made it so that the good and the bad memories can separate just a little. Following along like a tiny stream picking up other tiny streams before joining the river. And this river will steadily flow. Flow right against the dam that has been built to protect those puzzle pieces.
The problem with this dam is that it is an old dam. A dam that looked more like a patch worked quilt made by a child. And this dam is getting tired. Tired of holding back the constant river. Tired of being rammed over and over again. Assaulted by the individual drops that have ganged up and raged war against this dam. It isn't the dam's fault. It is just doing its job. The fault lies behind the dam...with the Builder.
Maybe this Builder needs to realize that there is no hope keeping this dam from breaking. Maybe the Builder needs to let go of the blueprints and stop filling all the cracks. Maybe start picking away at the patches and take control of the breakdown. Maybe the first piece will be a letter.
A letter that has been written and rewritten a million times. Torn up...tossed away...flushed...and burned...but never forgotten. A letter of truths and pains from the past. A letter of choices and consequences. A letter of forgiveness. The final destination for this letter.....Montana.
The down pour is once again over...but never far away.
Wednesday, September 3, 2014
My Labyrinth. Day 3
So I need more structure in my schedule. I have too much free time on my hands now. I do however have a million lists of things I SHOULD be doing...but alas...it isn't happening! Why? Because I'm an adult and I don't feel like it right now. Make sense?
But this is a turning point in my life. In fact I've hit so many turning points in my life that I swear I am trapped in some sort of labyrinth. I'm not sure if there is a Minotaur chasing me, or if he is around the next turn. Thankfully the last few turns I have not found him...but he is there...waiting to devour me...to turn my life upside down and sideways.
So which way am I turning? Left? Right? Up? Down? Maybe I should just stand still and see what happens. Maybe all of these walls change places as soon as I walk past? Stay put and gather all of the pieces together before I make my move. Sounds like a plan...so I can add that to my list of things to do. HA
But slowly things have been changing and being put into place. I have stopped dating/actively dating. I have deleted the dating sites and have made it very known to many friends and family that I am no longer searching. I thought my life was ready to add a man into it, but I was wrong...and that is okay.
No serious harm done. One broken heart...but I have a good first aid kit with plenty of Band-Aids. Peel one open...stick it on...and off I go. I'm used to it. I give myself a few minutes in the morning to be hurt...then I move on. I pick myself up and brush myself off. I put on my sexy black boots, and cute new dress. I let my hair fall over my shoulders and give a small smile. Then slowly...The boots come off. The dress is hung back up. My hair is tied back into a messy bun. And the smile....the smile becomes a small shrug.
And life goes on......
But this is a turning point in my life. In fact I've hit so many turning points in my life that I swear I am trapped in some sort of labyrinth. I'm not sure if there is a Minotaur chasing me, or if he is around the next turn. Thankfully the last few turns I have not found him...but he is there...waiting to devour me...to turn my life upside down and sideways.
So which way am I turning? Left? Right? Up? Down? Maybe I should just stand still and see what happens. Maybe all of these walls change places as soon as I walk past? Stay put and gather all of the pieces together before I make my move. Sounds like a plan...so I can add that to my list of things to do. HA
But slowly things have been changing and being put into place. I have stopped dating/actively dating. I have deleted the dating sites and have made it very known to many friends and family that I am no longer searching. I thought my life was ready to add a man into it, but I was wrong...and that is okay.
No serious harm done. One broken heart...but I have a good first aid kit with plenty of Band-Aids. Peel one open...stick it on...and off I go. I'm used to it. I give myself a few minutes in the morning to be hurt...then I move on. I pick myself up and brush myself off. I put on my sexy black boots, and cute new dress. I let my hair fall over my shoulders and give a small smile. Then slowly...The boots come off. The dress is hung back up. My hair is tied back into a messy bun. And the smile....the smile becomes a small shrug.
And life goes on......
Tuesday, September 2, 2014
First Day of School - Day 1
I think I picked the wrong day to start this challenge. Today was the first day of school for the boys....and I had so much to say....and too much free time! After dropping the boys off at the bus stop (their dads house) and off at school, I was bored. I didn't want to clean. I didn't want to watch TV. I was so bored I started dinner and had it done by 3:30...grrrr. So I took a nap...a wonderfully relaxing 4 hour nap. Which was perfect because I haven't been sleeping very well lately.
Maybe tomorrow I will get something done. Probably not, but maybe. I do have an appointment to talk to my advisor at UWGB, because I dropped all of my classes. My financial aid was not approved, but it will be approved for next semester....so the waiting begins. But until then...I am bored.
HOWEVER, I had time to search through pictures of the boys on their first day of school....and combined them. They are getting so big...way to fast!
Maybe tomorrow I will get something done. Probably not, but maybe. I do have an appointment to talk to my advisor at UWGB, because I dropped all of my classes. My financial aid was not approved, but it will be approved for next semester....so the waiting begins. But until then...I am bored.
HOWEVER, I had time to search through pictures of the boys on their first day of school....and combined them. They are getting so big...way to fast!
Monday, September 1, 2014
Logging out...Day 0
Today is my last day on Facebook. I know, I know I can see you rolling your eyes already, but let me explain. I will be back (most likely), and I can still keep in touch, but I would much rather spend the time wasted on Facebook with my family and friends.
I find myself waking up and scrolling through my newsfeeds before my eyes are even semi open. I spent two days in Wisconsin Dells wishing I had a water camera so I could take a bunch of pictures to show my "Facebook family". I am constantly checking and rechecking to see if I have "likes" or "comments" or if any of my friends have posted something new.
I'm hooked. I'm addicted. I need help. So where do I go? Everyone seems to be on Facebook. I beat the Candy Crush addiction....after a few times. So why do I expect this time to work out? Well for starters....I'm NOT giving myself a deadline. I'm NOT saying that I will be gone for XXX amount of days. And I am neither deleting nor deactivating Facebook....I'm just not going to be checking it. However, I will be having a friend monitor it...just in case.
That is it. Those are the rules I am following. Short and sweet. I am also going to be limiting myself to one post a day on here...so I won't find myself attached to this site as much as Facebook. I don't want to transfer one addiction for another....that would defeat the purpose!
So here goes. Just need to deleted the apps on my phone...in one second...I need to check on a few more...nope...not going to do it. The app has been deleted from my phone. Wow, I have more memory already! Nice bonus.
Now to finish up the dishes and off to bed....the boys go back to school tomorrow!!!!!!!! SUPER EXCITED!!!!
I find myself waking up and scrolling through my newsfeeds before my eyes are even semi open. I spent two days in Wisconsin Dells wishing I had a water camera so I could take a bunch of pictures to show my "Facebook family". I am constantly checking and rechecking to see if I have "likes" or "comments" or if any of my friends have posted something new.
I'm hooked. I'm addicted. I need help. So where do I go? Everyone seems to be on Facebook. I beat the Candy Crush addiction....after a few times. So why do I expect this time to work out? Well for starters....I'm NOT giving myself a deadline. I'm NOT saying that I will be gone for XXX amount of days. And I am neither deleting nor deactivating Facebook....I'm just not going to be checking it. However, I will be having a friend monitor it...just in case.
That is it. Those are the rules I am following. Short and sweet. I am also going to be limiting myself to one post a day on here...so I won't find myself attached to this site as much as Facebook. I don't want to transfer one addiction for another....that would defeat the purpose!
So here goes. Just need to deleted the apps on my phone...in one second...I need to check on a few more...nope...not going to do it. The app has been deleted from my phone. Wow, I have more memory already! Nice bonus.
Now to finish up the dishes and off to bed....the boys go back to school tomorrow!!!!!!!! SUPER EXCITED!!!!
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